• Gator Quad


Updated: Aug 6, 2020

I know the three smaller humans go to this place called ‘school’. It is where they teach young humans all sorts of things that I do not find particularly useful. It doesn’t teach them to understand my cues when I want a treat or when it is time to be quiet for my naps. I fail to see the point of them disappearing six hours a day if they don’t know that!

When they are gone, I take naps, groom my long, floppy ears, and chew on cardboard boxes and hay. Although the house is peaceful during those times, it can be a bit too quiet. When they return, they give me treats to reward me for having to watch the house all by myself.

One trick is for me to balance on my hind legs to get a better view of what they are eating. Once they see this, their hearts melt, and I am provided with bananas.

On a few occasions, they even let me into the living room to hop to my heart's content. However, once the humans have had enough of the shiny black device that shows moving pictures and makes noise, they attempt to coax me back to my cage. I am quick, and if I am not ready to go in, it takes a long time for my humans to bring me back to my area willingly.

Once springtime arrived, something was different. Not only had the presence of the birds increased, but also my humans. Now they hang about the house all day, even the one that goes to ‘college’. They informed me they have to learn from home now. This was great, because they are my subjects, and I have more time to train them to do as I say.

They used to leave around seven for school; now they get up at various times and spend much longer times petting me and cleaning my cage. When I hop around in the living room now, they seem to be in no hurry and do not chase me to bring me back home. When I am ready to go back, the humans tell me,

“Martha, hop around a little longer we can stay up now!” So I do.

I later learned their increasing presence is due to this ‘coronavirus’, and it all started with a pangolin. I have no idea what that is, but this coronavirus thing has made my humans shuffle around the house nervously, and they keep reminding each other they cannot go out.

For the past week they scattered little replicas of me all over the house, and they kept commenting that I'm their Easter bunny. I fail to understand why I am an Easter bunny for a few days, and a plain bunny for the rest of the year. They even gave me a soft Easter basket for me to play with, and my struggling to move it made them think I was adorable.

On the day of Easter, my humans always leave for a long ‘mass’. I do not fully understand what their rituals mean, but they describe it as a service they cannot miss. I was shocked that this year they had to watch the service on their shiny black device with the moving images, instead. I am starting to understand how serious this ‘coronavirus’ is.

Now that this virus has forced my humans to stay at home, I have had the opportunity to train them to answer my calls for treats and for snuggles. And I can say from just the past few weeks, that they are learning faster every day. Who's the pet now?

~~ Martha Dosch, Bunny and official owner of Mary Dosch (Class of '24)

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